Plus: 'Seabiscuit,' JWoww's impromptu bathroom and more bonus 'Shore.'
By Jim Cantiello
Snooki on Monday's episode of "Jersey Shore"
Photo: MTV
Let's get right into the five best moments from Monday night's (January 17) "Jersey Shore":
5. I Have a Dream
So, we got a bonus episode this week, and on Martin Luther King Jr. Day, no less — just in time for Snooki and Pauly D to liken their contrasting tans to "jungle fever." Yikes.
Perhaps we should focus on drunk Snooki eating a raw potato instead!
4. Snooki and Seabiscuit
Vinny says, "We have this thing with Snooki that, when she drinks, you don't know what's gonna come out of her mouth" — but that works both ways.
Like that time, five seconds later, when she crawled into Vinny's bed in order to get some action from "Seabiscuit." Oh, right, that's Snooki's nickname for Vinny's manhood. Why hasn't this show won an Emmy yet?
3. Drunk Deena
Speaking of drunk people, Deena was kicked out of a club after falling off a stage. As security carried her out, she drunkenly slurred to them, "I'm fine. I'm fine."
No, really, she's fine. She's on "Jersey Shore"! MTV pays her more the drunker she gets! It's all good.
2. JWhoa, What the Hell Is JWoww Doing?!?
Speaking of other drunk people, JWoww decided to relieve herself behind a bar. Seriously. But, you know, she rinsed the area with a soda gun, so, "It doesn't smell anymore."
Note to self: Never order a beer upstairs at Karma.
1. Snooki Gets Arrested ... and Remixed
Snooki was basically a drunken mess the entire episode, and it was music to my ears. So I think now's a good time for a "Jersey Shore" r-r-r-r-REMIX! Check out the embedded video for a musical breakdown of Snickers' sauced shenanigans, including a 10 a.m. beer bong and body shots with a 65-year-old man. You will not be disappointed.
Don't miss "Jersey Shore," airing Thursday nights at 10 p.m. ET on MTV.
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